Miscellaneous Rumbles

Idiot warps wife’s wooden bowls with water, would wike to wectify w…

51

Ya know Olivia, the olive oil is a goog idea, and then some high grit steel wool, as a side, I repair old furniture, and that is a method to use, before buying extremely expensive varnish and stain to finish the job. Vinegar is also a good tool.I wood use vinegar first with a good polish and then the oil and a very fine polish next. After the olive oil I would not do a thing, after all you need to eat out of it. Good girl, very smart, and or, at the same time, very well read.

Thanks.

52

My friend's wife wants everyone to know that she appreciates all the advice and thoughtful concern, but "it's OK, it's JUST a bowl."

I'm not sure she understands that, on the GDP, nothing is "just" anything, but she does say she doesn't want to kill the thread.

53

Better yet; She doesn't appear to want to kill the idiot. Well, I tried to add a wink but it's not working. My comment was meant as a lighthearted jab.

54

Of course. Understood!

55

yes in ancient lore, disposal of the perpetrator often results in a return to the original norm..

sleep tite tim!

hahaha

cheers

57

Incredible! Your back for a week or two and you start an EPIC thread about a wooden bowl. So cool!

58

Ya know Olivia, the olive oil is a goog idea, and then some high grit steel wool, as a side, I repair old furniture, and that is a method to use, before buying extremely expensive varnish and stain to finish the job. Vinegar is also a good tool.I wood use vinegar first with a good polish and then the oil and a very fine polish next. After the olive oil I would not do a thing, after all you need to eat out of it. Good girl, very smart, and or, at the same time, very well read.

Thanks.

– chrisbo

I claim no special wisdom; I simply am the current custodian of "priceless" artifacts from "Olivia"s prior to me. I still am responsible for the perfect wooden spoon to ensure that the fondant doesn't crystallize too rapidly, the one the bowl of which has been so well used that it now is angled and more resembles a spatula--that one I recall as belonging to my great great grandmother Livvie.

I'm relatively certain that if I ever were to put soap into a wooden bowl or the cast iron skillets, corn cob shaped cornbread makers, or whatever, that my Ancients would assemble to chastise me for using more than vinegar to complete the cleaning after a quick water bath.

The olive oil, or bacon grease is the secret of course.

59

Ahhhhhhhhh, you said "bacon grease"...

Can you say that lower and slower?

60

I claim no special wisdom; I simply am the current custodian of "priceless" artifacts from "Olivia"s prior to me. I still am responsible for the perfect wooden spoon to ensure that the fondant doesn't crystallize too rapidly, the one the bowl of which has been so well used that it now is angled and more resembles a spatula--that one I recall as belonging to my great great grandmother Livvie.

I'm relatively certain that if I ever were to put soap into a wooden bowl or the cast iron skillets, corn cob shaped cornbread makers, or whatever, that my Ancients would assemble to chastise me for using more than vinegar to complete the cleaning after a quick water bath.

The olive oil, or bacon grease is the secret of course.

– Olivia Anne

So I assume that putting woodware and ironware in the dishwasher is right out...

you know I'm being silly now...

61

By the way, by polish, I just mean a good rub with steel wool.

62

Tk, I'm mighty glad to see that drawing come back. Kudos!

63

Of course. Understood!

– Proteus

Thanks for responding Tim.

I use 3M pro grade "Scotch Brite" and mineral oil for the wooden spoons and cutting boards that I make. I feel the steel wool can leave particles in wood grain that could possibly rust in the future.

65

By the way, by polish, I just mean a good rub with steel wool.

– chrisbo

Polish is one thing, polish is another.

I'm a very fine Polish.

66

Ahhhhhhhhh, you said "bacon grease"...

Can you say that lower and slower?

– noiselab

Darling Noise, if that is enticing, have you had dark chocolate fudge with salted pecans and BACON strips so that when cut into squares you get a piece of a strip with every fudge section? Nearly perfect, really.

67

Yeah I am a terrible speller.

68

Anyone who has only one way of spelling a word lacks imagination.

69

Elmer Fudd and Mel Blanc... politically incorrect, good thing we were young and no one thought too hard.

From the beginning of this thread, if not already mentioned,...it should have read... the "Wit"-iot!

70

A year later...

I thought all concerned citizens would want a follow-up report on the bowl.

It turns out that my friend, being inclined by a fundamentally lazy disposition to leave more or less well enough alone, ultimately opted through sheer omission to do none of the above to the warped bowl.

However, he reports that the bowl has had a spontaneous remission and returned to its original shape, no doubt embedded in its unconscious.

All's swell that ends so, and the bowl thanks you for your concern.

71

The moral of the story....take care out your bowl. The wife's,doubly so.

72

Although I'm all for a happy ending, and it seems like there's one here for the bowls at least, the mystery of how you found this thread will haunt me til my dying days.

73

Don't let me spook yer.

HOW I found it is prosaic enough: I remembered "idiot warps" from the title and Great God Google smiled on me.

WHY I thought of it is another question. I blame sleep deprivation.

74

Although I'm all for a happy ending, and it seems like there's one here for the bowls at least, the mystery of how you found this thread will haunt me til my dying days.

– crowbone

But re-reading it had Karen and I both rolling on the floor!!! Absolutely wonderful thread-age!!

75

I really like Powdog's solution since I'm concerned that squeezing the bottom surface of the bowl towards the top surface is just going to pull all of the pieces of the bowl apart after applying steam. Could be a fun experiment in and of itself - but likely catastrophic for the bowl. Compression stress can do weird things to piecework assemblies. Then again, the glue might be stronger than the wood...

His rather elegant solution using the right sized colander as a controlled-area press is very likely to flatten the rim - but it may not flatten the rim parallel to the bottom of the bowl. If the colander is the correct depth (how likely is that?), it may be a non-issue.

You could put something in the inverted bowl to press up against the bottom of the bowl while it's all being pressed, but there's still no guarantee the bottom will end up parallel to the top (or remain reasonably flat!). You might still end up shaving the bottom.

How many pages can we over-think this for?

– noiselab

I don't really know. But, I like what we've got so far. (I have lost the ability to remove part of the quoted material, apparently. Guidance, please.)


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