Miscellaneous Rumbles

Disrespectful or not?

1

Okay. So there is a cemetery in Hugo, Oklahoma that has primarily deceased circus performers. A lot of the headstones are large and related to each performers career. Very neat looking! Apparently it is not uncommon for people to stop and take pictures. When passing through this little town a while back, me and my girlfriend stopped at the cemetery, took a look around and took a few pictures. Now I felt weird about this but my girlfriend said that they were once performers and that she thought they would actually appreciate the attention.

Soooooo... we were talking about visiting Hugo again and taking a few film clips at the cemetery to use as some video material for an upcoming album teaser. I'm not talking about coming in with a film crew, more like walk in with an iPad get the shots pay respects and go.

Now is this completely wrong? :|

2

I don't see why that would be disrespectful. The headstones are there to commemorate the dead and provide a link to the living. And the dead get a chance to perform again.

3

I can't see why it would be considered disrespectful. Personally I don't think the feelings of the dead are relevant, but you should put yourself in the shoes of their surviving friends and family. If you saw somebody taking pictures of a loved one's grave would it upset you?

The other point to consider here is that you obviously don't feel comfortable about doing this otherwise you wouldn't have even thought of asking. Perhaps you already have your answer...?

4

I don't think it's disrespectful, but it ultimately depends on why you're taking photos or film. If the end result is something informative, or honoring them, it's perfectly acceptable. If it's just a "wow look at the crazy grave stones" it's not right IMO.

My theory is, as mentioned before, put yourself in the family's shoes and see where you stand on it. If I'm buried I wouldn't care about it...

5

I agree with everyone else and do not see it as at all disrespectful. Actually I think Nick Funke hit the nail on the head.

6

No more than making charcoal rubbings like they do on so many ancient gravestones.

7

Alright thanks, folks. If it were a family member of mine I wouldn't mind a bit....as long as they weren't being disrespectful in their actions.

8

Do the buried people ever complain?

If not, I don't see any harm.

10

If no signs are posted, you aren't trampling all over the graves & you aren't destroying or disturbing... It's probably fine. Sounds like a neat place

12

Have you ever known a performer who (truly) didn't like to be photographed?

We're all in the business of show for one reason - to be looked at and loved. If that could continue on after death I for one wouldn't be at all upset...:D

14

You leave a chunk of stone, engraved so people remember. People come by and take pictures of said chunk of stone, thus, remembering the person. Seems legit to me.

15

Yup. Since your stated intentions are to be respectful, you are.

If your intentions were to use the pictures in an insulting way or to perpetrate some sort of mischief or vandalism --- 'nother story.

But I worry about your statement that the cemetery has "primarily deceased circus performers" --- you mean there are a few there who are NOT deceased???? 8-o

16

I with the majority here, aslong as your respectful to the graves and the people in them.

17

If you go to Forest Lawn on any given day there are hundreds of people gawging and taking picures.

I'm with your girlfriend.

18

as long as you're OK with the curse.

19

Yup. Since your stated intentions are to be respectful, you are.

If your intentions were to use the pictures in an insulting way or to perpetrate some sort of mischief or vandalism --- 'nother story.

But I worry about your statement that the cemetery has "primarily deceased circus performers" --- you mean there are a few there who are NOT deceased???? 8-o

– Parabar

Yup. Since your stated intentions are to be respectful, you are.

If your intentions were to use the pictures in an insulting way or to perpetrate some sort of mischief or vandalism --- 'nother story.

But I worry about your statement that the cemetery has "primarily deceased circus performers" --- you mean there are a few there who are NOT deceased???? 8-o

– Parabar

Yeah...the circus animals.

Speaking of which, circus animals are generally tortured, so many of the buried could be animal haters. Or at least "trainers", which are known to treat animals the worst.

just sayin'

20

Yup. Since your stated intentions are to be respectful, you are.

If your intentions were to use the pictures in an insulting way or to perpetrate some sort of mischief or vandalism --- 'nother story.

But I worry about your statement that the cemetery has "primarily deceased circus performers" --- you mean there are a few there who are NOT deceased???? 8-o

– Parabar

Yup. Since your stated intentions are to be respectful, you are.

If your intentions were to use the pictures in an insulting way or to perpetrate some sort of mischief or vandalism --- 'nother story.

But I worry about your statement that the cemetery has "primarily deceased circus performers" --- you mean there are a few there who are NOT deceased???? 8-o

– Parabar

Ha! Smart@$$! :D

Well I suppose I'll be heading to Hugo if all goes my way.

Thank you all for the input!

21

I just caught this thread. I happen to be a Funeral Director and agree that as long as your intentions aren't destructive or disrespectful, you're just fine. Just a professional opinion.

22

Showman's Rest and Bull Rider's Reprieve

I'm pretty sure this is the cemetery in question, and it is pretty popular for pictures. Pretty interesting place. Lane Frost is buried there, some folks may recognize him as the young bull rider that was killed by a bull in 89.

23

I think it's disrespectful and an insult to corpses everywhere.


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